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I'm pretty sure this lady has been discussed on here before but have a look at this
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll? ... 620wt_1063

I challenge to read through the entire description without wanting to destroy something.
I felt like gnawing my arm off after the first few lines.

Not a lady, but the same seller as chelseadollshouseantiques and several other noms-de-plume on eBay as dicussed elsewhere...hilarious!